THURSDAY, 25 JANUARY
DAY 102

This eve I did duel Armsman Philo over the matter of my joke regarding a Pink Bunny Guild. As expected, the Armsman beat me. Still, my pride was sorely hurt at the ease with which he did it. He is truly well practiced. Most surprisingly, Martel loaned me his sword for the duel. I was astounded, as I thought his friendship lost to me, due to my intemperate words.

I escaped the whole affair with a minor wound in my side, which Sansamor fretted over like a mother hen until Faith and I managed to get away to the baths. Every time I see her I fall in love anew. This is eve in the baths may have been one of the happiest in my life. I have no doubt that it is Faith I am meant to be with. Mine Aidmhiel... I will let no harm come to her ever, for she is more to me than my own life. I wish all within the castle could know even a small measure of the joy she has given me.

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TUESDAY, 23 JANUARY
DAY 100

Many things have happened of late, but I have refrained from writing in hopes that it was all a bad dream. Alas, it is not. Zero, my great friend and noble friend, is no more. In a fit of desperation he leapt to his death from the highest tower as Punzel tried to restrain him. To say I was distraught would be a most grave injustice. A mania decended on me like none other in my experience, and I have done irrepairable damage while in its thrall.

I cursed Honour in Punzel's presence when she called Zero a betrayer, for Zero was the truest friend I had ever known. He was to stand with me at my wedding. I spoke irrationally and made reprehensible threats. I hesitate even to put quill to parchment regarding them. My words have sorely jeapordized my chances of Duelist induction, and I can only hope the damage may be undone.

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SUNDAY, 14 JANUARY
DAY 91

I finally understand why I did the things I did in my last life. But still I cannot forgive myself. Sera Diana was most compassionate and helpful, but my guilt lingers. I wish Faith had been about. Faith... I feel like I'm doing something wrong there. Its probably just paranoia but I hope not. I felt terrible that I missed the story contest, I so wanted to be there to support her.

I talked to a sera named Darla this eve, who strangely reminded me of Faith. *sigh* I must truly be obsessed... She seemed nice, and it was good to talk to someone about my worries, without fear of making things worse. I would rather it had been Faith though...

The only personal annoyance this eve came in the form of sera Santlar. Her aloofness and general snobbery irk me tremendously, though I'm hard pressed to say exactly why. Oh well, dear journal, I've rambled enough this eve. Wish me a dreamless sleep...

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SATURDAY, 13 JANUARY
DAY 90

So I thought to myself today, "A journal might be a good idea, since you're the only who wants to listen to yourself anyway." I'm getting married... Wow, I never thought that would happen. After Flipp disappeared I never even thought I'd be in love. But Faith is so... perfect, at least for me.

I had the dreams again last night. They're getting worse again, and I don't know if I can hold them back much longer. I've decided to talk to the Rememberers in hopes of finding a way to regain more of my past and perhaps put some of this to rest. Well, I grow tired...